A modern love story, I Regret Everything confronts the oceanic uncertainty of what it means to be alive, and in love. Jeremy Best, a Manhattan-based trusts and estates lawyer, leads a second life as published poet Jinx Bell. To his boss’s daughter, Spaulding Simonson, Jeremy, thirty-three, is already halfway to dead. When Spaulding, an aspiring nineteen year-old writer, discovers Mr. Best’s alter ego, the two become bound by a devotion to poetry and an awareness that time is limited. 

A skilled satirist, Greenland creates finely wrought characters that reveal the complexity of the human condition – at its very best, and utter worst. I Regret Everything explores happiness and heartache with a healthy dose of skepticism, and an understanding that the reality of love encompasses life, death, and iambic pentameter.


Greenland’s fourth novel proves affecting and funny.
— Carmela Ciuraru, New York Times
Edgy and sweet, witty and wise, I Regret Everything is rollicking good fun. It’s also, in the end, a deeply moving love story between two unforgettable characters discovering what it means to truly be alive.
— Maria Semple, author of Where’d You Go Bernadette
I Regret Everything: A Love Story is an intoxicating and ultimately moving modern romance…Greenland’s a skilled satirist who can’t help but pepper the book with wit.
Los Angeles Review of Books
I was under the spell of the book and the fierce message at its core — “Never give in” — and its acute sense of the velocity of time. Days later, I’m still touched, inspired and wounded by I Regret Everything. Consider yourselves warned.
— Jesse Kornbluth, Headbutler.com
Greenland hits all the right notes for this fledgling romance—attraction, uncertainty, self-consciousness—as the main characters tell the story in distinctive voices. His playful, well-crafted writing captures personality or atmosphere in a few phrases, and the characters’ self-assessments reveal the rich inner lives driving their actions.